Friday, August 8, 2008

To the Woman Who lives Across the Street.

No those are not our dogs that bark all day long. Our dogs are quiet (for the most part) When I leave for work they go to sleep with the occasional snack and food break. The only time they bark is when they hear strange noises, if someone rings the doorbell for example. They have also been known to bark if all the neighbours dogs are barking or if they hear a cat fight outside.
But they do not sit by the front door and bark ALL DAY LONG.

Nor do they bark and wake you up at 6:30 in the morning. This is before I leave for work. Minou is still sleeping at this point. Birdie has gone out for her morning constitutional but she is with her Daddy and doesn't bark when she is with Daddy, not to mention that happens at 5:30 am.

They sounded like bigger dogs you say - hmmm - MAYBE BECAUSE IT ISN'T THEM. Did you go up to the window of our house to listen? My dogs do not sound like big dogs when they bark. Birdie sounded like a cat yesterday.

Your neighbour to your immediate right has a little dog. IT barks ALL DAY LONG. Yes it annoys me too. ALL DAY. From the minute they leave until they come home. It started the day they moved in and hasn't stopped yet after a month.

Our neighbours to our right also have two dogs. Although they don't bark all day long they do like to look out the window and bark at everything that moves. My dogs can't see out any windows.

If our dogs were barking I would appreciate you come to us in a kinder matter. Perhaps ask us if we know that our dogs are barking - ask if there is anything we can do to help quiet them down. Not yell at us accusingly from across the street when we have never ever seen your face before.....

Now I have a question for you Woman Who Lives Across the Street. Are those your teenagers who no matter what time of night or what day of the week scream across the parking lot waking me up on an otherwise quiet summer night? Are they the teenagers who stole my boyfriends bike? Are they the teenagers with the friend who was 'totally wrecked' the other night and couldn't even stand up in the middle of the street screaming?

Personally I would rather have a small dog bark during the day with all the other daily noises that happen then screaming drunk teenagers in the middle of a quiet night when I have to work the next day.

Next time I will not walk away so nicely. You have made me angry. If I can think of a way to say this nicely to you I will.. Right now I have a feeling I would start a turf war. Maybe I should get a recording of dogs barking and put it outside your window tomorrow. Or even better record your idiot children and replay that for you a few times......

Ugh. I hope your house is the new one that has been listed today. I hope it sells quickly and that you only get half your asking price because the market is so slow. And I hope you are moving far away.


  1. wow- stupid lady!
    She is a total idiot but you can't rise to it or you will have problems like her telling her teenagers that your back fence is actually an outdoor latrine etc.
    If you talk really nicely to her, however much it galls you, you may shame her into being a better person to you at least. If she responds like an idiot then tell your boyfriend that the fence behind her house is actually an outdoor latrine and encourage him to have lots of hops based beverages with his friends late at night behind her house...

  2. What an asshole.

    I wish there was a way of dealing with crappy neighbours without setting off a war. If you figure one out, let us know. We'll pass that info on to the people in our hood that we are leaving behind when we move to get away from our neighbour from hell.

  3. Ohforgoodnesssake.

    I think Thyrza has the best advice. You pull out that "talking to grownups" voice that you reserve for addressing store clerks and use it on her. Perhaps you could offer to talk nicely to the people with the barking dogs on behalf of the neighbours... or perhaps you could just bag up some of Minou's smellier poopies and leave it, on fire, on her front step.

  4. oh YEAH! the flaming poo bag! do it ( if all else fails).